I Love Being 20
Story told at 21:06 // 1 person(s) left violent reaction(s). after 20 years, i can say this is my happiest birthday, so far!

for my birthday bliss, read my previous post. :D

i was supposed to wake up at 8:00am dahil 10:00am sana dapat nasa USTe¹ na ko. pero dahil hindi ako nakapag-alarm at di man lang ako ginising ni Mommy, 9:35am na nung magising ako. 15 messages, isa na ang message galing ke Dadi na nakatulugan ko na naman nga sya, hehe. plus Pij's call. tuwing gigising kase sya, nagmimisscall sya. lovin' it. ako agad naiisip nya when he wakes up. sweeet, kilig to the bones, hahaha.♥

gising agad. nervous mode dahil clearance day. eh alam ko naman na status ko. hahaha. oh well. kahit na. aun nga. almost 12:00 noon na ko dumating. pagdaan ko sa Engtap², andun na ung classmates ko. at si Lorenz³!!! i soooper missed him! :) tagal din naman di nagkita... aun. pero pinutol muna ang usapan at kinuha ko muna ang clearance ko. buti naman at andun pa sina Jasper⁴. hehe. matagal pa ung bnyahe ko sa pagkuha ko. hahaha. :P aun. chineck na rin namin ni Steph ung thesis⁵ namen. pero siguro nakalimutan ni Ma'am Cha⁶ nung pinaalala ko sa kanya nung Friday. haha. hina na ng memory. hehe. aun. tas bumalik na kame sa Engtap...

nagkayayaan sa SM San Lazaro. nauna na sina Allyson, Gena, Steph, Gelo at Master. kasama si Diana at Ernest, naghintay kame ng pagkatagal-tagal para sa friend ni Lorenz na immeet nya na ipapakilala daw sakin dahil naghahanap daw ng chiks. hahaha. abnormal talagang bajung un. si Noel. OJT-mate daw nya na crush nya. haha. tumambay muna kame sa Beanhopper's at pumunta pa talaga kame sa Commerce Building na pagkalayo-layo para sa lalaking un. hahaha. well, we have sooo different preferences. :P

then pumunta na kame sa SM. nakisakay na lang kame sa magandang Civic ni Ernie. inggit ako. gusto ko rin ng kotse. Daddyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy... hahaha. aun. past 1:30pm na kami nakarating. muntik na ata himatayin sa gutom sina Allyson. hehe. sa Kenny Roger's kame kumain. i haven't eaten anything since morning kaya i ordered my favorite Solo A with bottomless iced tea and mashed potato side dish so i missed Pij again. haha. tagal din namin nakatambay lang. hanggang sa nilabas na ni Gelo ang Goldilocks cake. whoa! i was so surprised i wasn't able to say anything. hahaha. speechless. natuwa talaga ko. me candle pa na 20 kaya ramdam na ramdam ko ung pagtanda ko. hindi naman masyadong onti ung tao pero kahit na, nakatingin pa rin sila samin, sa akin. siguro tinitignan nila kung mukhang 20 na ba sila ko. haha. aun. tapos sinabayan pa ng Happy Birthday song sa Kenny Roger's. hahaha. grabe. natuwa talaga ko! parang nag-birthday na rin ako sa Jollibee o McDo. mas masaya pa dahil ginawa nila un para sakin para mapagaan ung loob ko at para masurprise talaga ko. well, hindi sila nabigo. :)

thank you [not in order] Allyson Yoro, Gena Bernardino, Steph Jose, Gelo Cruz, Diana Guevarra and Lorenz Zapata. love you guys. :) apir!

tas aun. nag-ikot-ikot tas nag-Worlds of Fun. di ako mahilig sa arcade pero dahil sa kakabigay ni Lorenz ng tokens sakin, napalaro ako sa racing cars, basketball at king of the hammer. oo. KING OF THE HAMMER. hahaha. nakakaadik grabe! kulang na lang bumili ako nung 52 tokens for 200. hehe. naka-10 tokens din ako para lang dun. bale 20 palo. 791 ang pinakamataas. malas dahil hindi ko man lang na-beat ung top score. pero okay na rin. at least, nakapag-labas ako ng sama ng loob... kahit sumakit talaga ung braso ko. hahaha. :P

tas umuwi na kame. sabay kame ni Lorenz hanggang Tomas Morato. tas ako direcho na. dumaan muna ko sa OLA para sa Adoration Chapel. pray. pray. pray. until i felt okay. ang sarap talaga ng feeling pag si God na kausap mo. walang makakapantay. :]

If you ask it from God in prayer, believe that it will be given to you.

pag-uwi ko sa bahay. aun. kinausap ko lang si Mommy about something tas tumawag si Daddy sakin. tas eto. nag-blog na ko. hahaha. haay. ang saya-saya ng araw na to. hindi ko talaga makakalimutan ung 20th birthday ko. :)

thanks sa lahat. muah. :]

Birthday Eve
Story told at 13:59 // 0 person(s) left violent reaction(s). It is a truth universally acknowledged that when one part of your life starts going well, another falls spectacularly to pieces.

currently playing September by Earth, Wind and Fire. i got this MP3 from Leona. i didn't know she loves this kind of music, too, the way i do. :D yeah, we had a bonding moment yesterday. haha. :P

10 hours to go before my 20th birthday. whew, i hate this countdown.

well, yesterday turned out to be a somehow good day for me. i was in school yesterday to know my status in one of my subjects that i took last sem for the second time. i was actually nervous... i thought i would fail because my groupmates and i weren't able to submit to her the CD of our project. but when we talked to her during their break time [me seminar kase sila, so break nila ng 12-2], okay na raw. puro 5.00 daw kame. hahaha. joke lang daw. passed daw lahat. although di nya pinakita ung grades namen. tsss, dapat lang na pumasa na kame dun. my goodness. i would've killed myself kung sinabi nyang pati dun bagsak ako. err.

tas aun. 1:30 pa lang nakatanga na ko. magkikita kame ni Pij ng 7pm. haha. buti na lang andun si Leona. at least me kasama ako. wala lang. kulitan lang. thanks to her, i have a copy of Made of Honor again. ayun, nanood na lang ako. hanggang sa dumating na ung classmates ko dahil me meeting sila ke Sir Verge para sa Thesis nila. bat kaya kame walang meeting ke Ma'am Cha? haha. haaay.

aun. 6 na. umalis na ko. iniwan ko na si Gerwin, Jerick, Gian at Nollie dun sa kinahihigaan naming corridor. haha. tulog sa FX. sarap talaga matulog.♥

next stop: SM Marikina to see my Pij. :) ikot. kaen. ikot. lakad. lakad. lakad. mahirap pala sumakay sa SM. hindi na kame babalik dun. haha. hinatid pa ko sa bahay. haay. kung pwede lang hindi ko na pauwiin si kulet. haha. :D

pagpasok ko, gising pa pala si Mommy. nakipagchikahan pa. nag-ayang bumili ng bibingka sa San Roque. go naman ako. inaaya ko sa Eastwood, ayaw naman. tsss. ayoko lang talaga ng nasa bahay. haha. muntik naman kame makabangga ng tatanga-tangang nakamotor. sorry for the term. ang tanga lang talaga! sorry ulit. hehe. :D aun. pagdating sa bahay, kwentuhan lang ulit tungkol sa buhay-buhay. haaay. buhay talaga...

october 18 na. ayoko pang mag-20. kung pwede ko lang pigilan ang oras...

i am happy. but i am soooo not happy. :(

Drive 'til I Drop
Story told at 01:17 // 0 person(s) left violent reaction(s). 3 drafts on my dashboard. GAHD. when will i be able to publish it? mali. will i still be able to publish it? ay nako.

i am currently suffering from severe colds with headache. i guess tomorrow, i have flu na. :(

this day, i acted as my mom's personal driver. hahaha. i had to wake up as early as 9:30am [for me, it's so early already] to drive for her.

ITINERARY
- Aling Mely's residence in ... [somewhere in Barangka, i forgot the name, haha] to pickup something
- LTO Marikina - to register Acey
- Landbank - to pay income tax
- Solomon's residence - to fetch Marc
- Tita Edith's residence - to fetch Tita Edith
- Robinson's Metro East - to pay bills
- Sta. Lucia - to eat brunch
- Garden of Gethsemane, Antipolo - to get receipts || first time to drive there :)
- SM Marikina - to see Anthony, HAHA
- McDo Sumulong Hiway - to eat dinner
- Shopwise Libis - to buy groceries
- Solomon's residence - to talk to Babe ♥ HAHAHA.

tsss. bat ba natuto pa ko magdrive? at bat ba nagkaron pa ko ng kasalanan. hindi tuloy ako makaangal. hahaha. pero okay na rin. wala naman akong gagawin. un nga lang, while we were eating fuckin' Chao Fan at Chowking Sta. Lu, Bernz texted me a message from Gerwin saying all grades were released by Ma'am Narcisuxo. hindi pa ako nakapunta. kaazar. sa halip na naayos na namen eh. tsk. oh well... life is really... life, after all.

***
Lorenz sent me a text message this afternoon. he said he will be going to USTe on Monday and he was asking me to come with him to meet his OJT-mate from Commerce. i miss him. :) i missed him more nung pinaramdam na naman nya kung ganu sya kabaliw. baliw talaga sya, lalo nung sinabi nyang:

Nghahanap ng chiks e. Haha. Ppkilala kta!

haaay. you're still the same Lorenz. HAHA. :D

i just wanna share. :P

***
going back...

i was actually not tired. i still did want to go to other places. SUMUKO LANG SILA. antok na antok na raw sila, maawa naman daw ako at me exam pa rin naman si Marc. hahaha. poor people.

on our way home, something went on. me magnanakaw ata or what... whatever. continued driving. i almost hit the mobile patrol. hahaha. bastos me. :P

talked to Pij. nothing but kulitan. hehe. i really miss that guy.♥

haay. i wanna see a lot of people. when will that happen? i wish i could see them all on my birthday. ALL of them... oooh, so impossible. tsk. :(

speaking of my birthday... i posted a bulletin a few moments ago. here it is:

From: Angela
Date: Friday, 17 October, 2008 1:31 AM
Subject: "What GOOD things have I done in 20 years? Comments please. Thanks. :)" - Angela Solomon
Message:
"What GOOD things have I done in 20 years? Comments please. Thanks. :)"

I'll be turning 20 on the 19th and since I have no plans yet, I decided to ask that question from you, guys. I just want to know if you are aware of the good things I have done for the past 20 years of my life. Well, for "changing-lifestyle" purposes. HAHAHA. Maybe you can also add the BAD things I have done. I know I have a lot, don't embarass me too much, okay? :))

Put some efforts please. *KAPAL... at least, you have to something to say about the bad things I've done, dba?* HAHAHA. Thanks. It will be a great help.

I need your moral support, guys. Please include "Kaya mo 'yan" on your comments. HAHAHA. *BALIW... another thing on the list, hehe.*

Thanks again. Bbye. :D

-- ANGELA SOLOMON | Angela | Angel | Angge | Anj | Jeje | Jela | Ela | Alej ♥

if you want to answer it, click this link then add a comment. i know you're not stupid not to know Friendster, are you?

sleep tight.

not in the mood to blog about things. haaay. when will my mood swing to its best? tsk.

Sembreak?
Story told at 18:11 // 0 person(s) left violent reaction(s). Literally, insensitivity can kill you. I realized that, wasting a grief does not, in any way, let my soul breathe.

today is the last day of our final examination week. yet, i can't feel the sembreak.

what i want to do all the day is to sleep, text, blog, talk on the phone, eat, sleep, text, blog, talk on the phone, eat, sleep... and so on, and so forth.

i also want to change my Friendster layout because i'm sooo nasusuya na with the colors and background. grr.

but wait! the sem's actually not yet over. we still have a bloody defense on Monday. Software Engineering side. we also have to finalize the documentation for hardbound. haay.

and i also have a lot of things to do this sembreak which is academically related. yes. it sucks you know. but i guess it'll be okay. than just staying and being a tall bum at home. hmmm, just accepting the fact... =/

fresh CS and IT graduates, you are in demand. as if i'm not graduating from CS. hahaha.

Dominic Dandan, a UST Computer Science Graduate Batch 2004, PM-ed me this afternoon regarding the IT Specialist position in Mitchell Madison Group. its office is located in Eastwood City, Libis, Quezon City. i gave him links to the CSS and SITE websites so he can spread the news. haha. he promised he won't be spamming. :D

.. of course, he doesn't even know i posted our conversation here. hehe. i know he'll know soon. :)

actually, i just hated the link he sent to me regarding their company when i read one of the following requirements:

Fundamental knowledge in Networking and Active Directory planning, rollout and troubleshooting with VPN and Cisco routers

oh my God. Cisco's haunting me. hahaha. f*ckin' course. i didn't learn anything except crimping. ksh.

well, i still felt happy because at least he's not forgetting his Alma Mater. he even said:

its tough sorting thru applicants in Jobstreet - we're not getting the proper "techie + good english communications skills + really want to learn" combo that we need, so i decided to just back home to USTe

cool huh. i guess he's expecting a lot from us. HAHAHA. :))

grabe. i really hate Ma'am Bea calling us Cisco casualties. if she only knows, her nape is also a casualty. wahahaha. ERRR! just so irritating... :<

Sir Jhay texted me again. the message was:

Go cee on October 16 8am- to 9am only for GAP White collection Photoshoot on Thursday at PIANDRE Saloon TIMOG,willing to cut and color hair for MAGAZINE Release butdget at 3k less 30% plus another budget for a series of f.show starting october-january with GAP and PIANDRE LAUNCH.need 8 female & 6 male lok 4 jhay layson-pls pass

i really want to come! haay. i just don't want to experience another rejection in this world again. grabe. i'm so pessismistic...! but why not try? it's my dream, you know. WAAA. bahala na nga! si Batman. :P

i just woke up. the feeling's so nice. i missed sleeping in the afternoon. hahaha. poor little girl... little?

my 20th birthday is in 8 days. haay. i have no plans yet. tsk. i want to have/do something extraordinary before i reach 20!!! any idea, guys? :P

i miss a lot of people. my friends. my highschool friends. Inah. Zarah. Angel. i wanna see them! and i want to meet JB, too. the way he wants to meet me, according to Dracz, if she's not lying [if she is, i'll kill her. HAHAHA]. and PJ. and Richard. and Darrell. and Father Stephen. Father Stephen is our retreat priest in Caleruega. i love him. after how many years of being sunk in my sins, sa kanya lang ako nakapag-confess ulit. and that confession had helped me move on with my life... giving me a brand new life in this world and a chance to prove myself to everybody. but not on this sem... WAAA.

no words to tell anymore. maybe later. or tomorrow. or the other day. or next week. or... tomorrow. :D

bye for now.

Two Subjects Down
Story told at 10:44 // 0 person(s) left violent reaction(s). the word sleeping is not in my vocabulary today. grabe.

since my night last, last night was a very good and sweet night for me, eventhough i didn't have enough sleep and because i have a failing grade, i had to act as my mom's personal driver yesterday. as usual, my driving techniques did not pass again. yes, she kept on telling me to drive slower and safer .. as if she's going to die with the way i drive. grrr.

whatever. i'm starting to tell insignificant stories again. ksh. currently, we are in queue for our defense. you read it right .. we are going to have a defense again but this time, our revised system. of course, cramming was associated with it.

i regret that i started revising our documentation late. i wasn't in the whole piece of myself in the afternoon that's why i thought if i would start by after lunch, i could finish it with the help of my groupmates before midnight comes.

and for always, i was wrong. bad trip!

4:00pm. 5:00pm... 8:00pm... 12:00mn... until 3:00am... i was up. but i felt my blood as if it was going to burst, so i decided to feel the bed. until my mom woke me up at 5:00am. 5:00 ng umaga!!!!!!!! i wasn't even finished with the diagrams and the other things Arizia asked me to do. panic ako. tumatawag na si Bernard. haha. di ko na lang sinagot dahil bukod sa malayo ako sa phone kong being charged, kelangan ko magmadali para matapos na. i told Bernz last night na i'm going to send him the finished documentation at 4:30am when he wakes up. at 4:30am, i was walking under the big beautiful Acacia trees.. surrounded by colorful fragrant flowers... HAHA. basta, nag-hallucinate agad ako pagkabangon. aynko.

pero atleast, i was able to send him all the files to be printed at 6:30am. i "felt" my bed again, trying to catch some sleep, but fate did not allow me to. i was just there.. lying.. hanggang sa mag-sink in sa utak kong 8:00 na. grabe. the rain poured so hard na parang ayaw na kong paalisin ng bahay. tsk. in all fairness, tumigil nung umalis na ko.

takbo sa LRT. Pidge texted, "Babe krrting q0 lang ng 0ffc, l8 aqo, hehe.." ako ung nanghinayang para sa kanya. hahaha.

past 9:00am na when i reached USTe. kanda-takbo pa ko sa España dahil tumatawag na si Arizia at Bernard. hehe. aun. ang haba ng pila pagdating ko. almost 12 na kame nakapagpresent ng revised system namen. documentation not colored. sayang ung color palette ko. huhu.

tas lunch na. we had to wait until 4:00pm para sa consultation ke Ma'am Bea, my new bestfriend. Sticks and Bowls with Gelolers, Steph and Master. kwentuhan hanggang sa antukin na kame lahat at magpasyang bumalik sa Eng'g para magpalamig.

me DOTA na ko sa laptop ko!!! waha. pagkatapos ng sembreak, ako na manghahamon kina Gerwin, Jerick at Gian. hahaha.

4:00 na. andun na si Ma'am Bea sa Lab. kinausap lang. gawin ang mga bagay na hindi mo gustong gawin kung kinakailangan.... wala pa rin. Sir Jale! Eng'r Baldelomar! Sir Amante! haay. naiiyak na naman ako. huhuhuhu.

hate it. tuwing naaalala ko ang pag-aaral ko, gusto ko na magquit sa school. napapariwara na ko. sana pwede pa ko magshift. kung me chance lang na magshift sa ibang course ngayon, my choices will be:

- Tourism
- Advertising
- Communication Arts

basta, Computer Science will never be on the list. :((

sige na. aral modes na. baka awayin na ko ni Pidge. :D

sana maging maganda ang resulta ng OR exam ko tom. i'm planning not to sleep until i master:

- Decision Theory
- Game Theory
- Inventory Model
- Network Model

luck is never for me. but i hope, you still wish a lot for me. tnxx.

7-9 ako tom. err. san ako pupunta after? san?!

bbye. :D

Second
Story told at 23:24 // 0 person(s) left violent reaction(s). today is the second day of our final examination. scheduled subjects: IT111 [Web-based Technologies and IT109 [Software Engineering]. dahil depressed talaga ako kagabe, hindi ako nakaaral ng ayos. lesson 5-10 ung kelangang aralin sa Webtech, ala-1:30 na, nasa lesson 6 pa rin ako. haha. parang ewan lang.

10:00am ang pasok ko. maaga naman ako nagising. nagpapagising kase ko ke PJ ng 6:30am ata. nagtataka ko kung bakit hindi nagmisscall. nagpapagising kase ko sa kanya. un pala, sira ata ung telepono koat full ang inbox [dahil puro text nya, haha]. hahaay. malas. aun. 9 ako dapat aalis ng bahay pero 8:30, nakahiga pa rin ako. haha. ang galing ko namang talaga. sinabotahe pa ko ng mga tricycle sa lansangan. trapik. usok. tagal ng train. hanggang sa 10:15-10:20 na ata ako dumating. si Sir Lintag ang proctor. naalala ko tuloy bigla si Tin. peyborit nya un eh. hahaha. aun. 10:34, tapos na ko. WINNER!! :))

SE and first exam. wala akong inaral dun kahit ano. puro stock knowledge ang ginamit ko. sana umubra. ni hindi ko nabasa ung bagong up na file. haha. puro tungkol dun pa naman ung mga lumabas. hehe. oh well... nahreview na lang ako sa Webtech pagkatapos ko mag-exam. tas mga 11:00am, dumating na si Ma'am Mich, ang aming proctor, para sa aming Webtech exam. nagdiwang ako nung sabihin nyang madali lang. pagkuha ko ng questionnaire, 1-30 na multiple choice. 1-5 na question about the case study/personal website project. COOL. sana pumasa ako kahit hindi talaga ako sigurado sa mga nakasulat dun. hahaha. madali lang sya kung tutuusin. basta nagbasa ka. buti na lang kahit papano nakapagbasa ko. me pornophotographic memory naman ako. minsan lang un. ang swerteng gumana kanina. hahaha.

after exam, matapos magtanungan tungkol sa exam, meeting ulit para sa Webtech/SE project. documentation submission again on Friday. ang dami pang kulang. hahaay. dahil kami ni Steph ang me hawak sa docu, kami ang mangangarag. dapat nga un ang ginagawa ko ngayon, ewan ko kung bakit nagba-blog ako... siguro dahil ayokong lumampas tong araw na to na hindi ko nakukwento ang mga nangyari ngayong araw na to.

nacheck ko na ung grades ko sa Math112 [Numerical Methods]. 20 lang ako sa Machine Problem #2!!! parang tanga lang. oh well, tanggap ko naman. hindi naman kase talaga ko nag-effort dun. nagkasala lang ako... pero at least, pasado na. bawas intindihin na. :)

aun. umaasa pa rin ako sa Cisco na magkaron ng himala...

saturday na ulit exam ko! OR pa! haynako! kelangang ma-perfect ko un para hindi ko na problemahin pa un!!! kamusta naman kaya... =/

***
since yesterday, napagplanuhan na naming dalawa ni Pidge na magkikita ulit kame. we met on friday last week. for him, matagal na kung maghihintay pa ng until Monday. hehe. since wala naman akong pasok tomorrow, pumayag na ko. kahit hindi ko alam kung pano ko aalis. haha. basta.. :D

aun nga. 2:30pm pa lang andito na ko sa bahay. trapik. nakakaidlip na ko sa jeep. andun pa rin ako. makapag-ice cream na nga lang. :P

net agad. haha. change layout [obvious naman di ba. hehe]. hintay ko mag-6pm para makaalis na ko at makipagkita ke babe. :)

5:30pm, dumating ung text ni Mommy. 5:15, nasa C5 na sila. dali-dali akong naligo, nagbihis at naglakad palabas. haha. baka abutan ako eh. hindi na ko makakaalis pag nagkataon. haha.

6:00pm pa lang nasa Rob na ko. nag-ikot muna ko. hanggang sa mapapunta ako sa National at naaliw sa magazines at books ng bahay at wedding gowns at ng bahay ulit. haha. ang ganda. hanggang sa dun na kami nagkita ni Pidge. :) sa sobrang adik ko dun sa mga tinitignan ko, dumaan na pala sya, hindi ko pa alam. haha. aun. :D

dinner @ KFC. nood movie after. Tropic Thunder. haha. sa totoo lang hindi ako mahilig sa ganung palabas, pero okay naman pala. :) siguro dahil na rin kasama ko si Pidge. hehe. :P

text si JB. text si Dracz. text si Pare. sangkatutak na text si Mommy. napansin na text ako ng text. tinigilan ko na. bahala na sila magtext. hahaha.

10:30pm na nung lumabas kami ng movie house. malamang, sarado na ung mall. dumaan pa kami sa Mcdo para bumili ng dinner ni Marc na nakatulog na kakahintay sakin. haha. tas binigay na ni PJ ung gift nya sakin [ewan ko kung anung meron]. basta, ang cute. ang sweet-sweet ng babe ko.♥

hindi ko alam kung hanggang kelan ganito sitwasyon. basta, masaya ako. bahala na kung anung meron... :)

NEW LAYOUT
Story told at 16:31 // 0 person(s) left violent reaction(s). weeee. dahil saturday pa exam ko at naghihintay pa ko ng hanggang 6:00pm para makaalis, nagpalit na lang ako ng layout. anu sa tingin nyo? hehe. temporary lang naman. sa bakasyon palit ulit. :D nasasawa na kase ko dun sa dati. hahaha.

haay. sad pa rin ako. kaya dito ko na lang binaling ung attention ko. tsk. malas talaga. grrr.

PIECES
Story told at 20:03 // 0 person(s) left violent reaction(s).

It is a truth universally acknowledged that when one part of your life starts going well, another falls spectacularly to pieces...

this day was extraordinary. aside from the unbelievable fact that this week's our last week for the semester, our exam started at 7:00am and I WASN'T LATE!!! so extraordinary, right? :D

the scheduled subjects this morning were the bloody Math112 [Numerical Methods] and IT253 [Cisco Networking 4.0]. i slept at 12:30am last night kahit pinilit ko lang para hindi ako antukin habang nag-eexam [yeah, inaantok ako pag nag-eexam lalo pag wala na akong maisagot]. sabi ko gigising na lang ako ng 3:30am para mag-aral ulit.

5:20am na ko gumising.

nauna ako magising ke PJ, pero 4:25am pa lang nag-misscall na sya. siguro naalala nya ung sinabi ko sa kanyang 3:30am ako gigising. hehe.

nang-asar pa ko. gusto ko ma-late ung kapatid ko. pero wala akong magawa, dahil dalawang shotgun ang tumatama sa mga tenga ko umagang-umaga pa lang. ligo + kaen + alis. maaga pa lang, polusyon na agad. grabe na talaga ang mundo.

ngayon lang ako sumakay ng pedicab ng umaga sa Legarda. grabe. 5 sa isang pedicab. 20 isang tao. kahit maipit na sya dun sa kinauupuan nya, okay lang. basta kumita lang. ang hirap talaga kumita ng pera.

hindi ako late. hindi ako late! HINDI AKO LATE! nagulat siguro ung classmates ko nung makita kong nauna pa ke Sir Alex [prof ko sa Numericals]. haha. nauna lang ako sa kanya ng mga ilang steps. :P at least di ba! :))

aun. umakyat lang pala sya para sabihing hindi kame sa room 57 mag-eexam at sa ICS Lab 2. OO. sa Lab. ibig sabihin, online. ONLINE!!! SYEEEEEEET! kung hindi lang baka ibagsak nya kami, magrereklamo kame. expected ko, dalawang problem: isa sa Interpolation Using Polynomials, isa sa Linear Systems. haay. marami talagang namamatay sa AKALA. aun. online exam. 19 bloody items for 1 hour and 45 minutes. walang Aitken's na paborito ko, walang Gauss-Jordan, walang Gauss-Forward at Backward. puro Newtons, puro Lagrange, puro Gauss-Seidel. no backtracking allowed so forced ka na sagutan un kahit hindi mo alam kung masasagutan mo ba talaga. GRABE!!! ayoko talaga ng ganung klaseng exam. kung bakit ba naman nahilig pa si Sir gumamit ng eLeap. napakamalas namang talaga. aun. halos maubos ko ung alloted time. pero me mga tanong akong hindi ko alam kung panu isolve. result? 45 out of 100. HOLY SH*T! buti na lang me allowance ako sa grade. kung hindi, wala na. makikiusap ako ke Sir para i-add ung subkect na Math112 for next sem. grrr.

as of now, out of 600, i have 383. me mga kulang pa. 3.0 pa yan. hahaha! poot-sa. wag lang bababa ng 50%. para kong nagpakamatay. T_T

***
next exam, Cisco. the schedule was 10-11. lintek na Ma'am Bea. ginawang 9-10. eh ni hindi ako nagbasa dun kahit Module 1!!! aun. nagkasala na naman kami... pero wala pa rin. mangiyak-ngiyak na ko dahil kung anu-anung lumabas na tanong dun. parang mga tae. 52 questions. i wasn't able to answer even half of it correctly. i got 43% for the finals, and that was the end of my happy days. I FAIL. we, Kuya Hermar and Champ, tried to talk to her and asked for a retake of any of the modular exams we had before. i remember i had a 91% grade for a module. if i could perfect that, i might pass. unfortunately, she didn't give us this chance. she kept on telling us that there's no more way to change the result. HAAY. i wanted to cry... but i wouldn't.

"I AM THE HAPPIEST BEING IN THIS WORLD TODAY!!!" that's the only thing i could say sarcastically. i left without waving goodbye to my classmates. i almost got hit by a jeep at España. and i wished i died when PJ texted me then a message appeared on my cellphone saying. "Check Operator Services". this would be the luckiest moment of my life.

i've been trying to tell myself that if we could talk to Sir Jale [another Cisco professor], he might help us. i really don't want to give up like that this time. Cisco isn't the only subject that's half-buried. me Webtech, SE at OR pa. hindi ko matanggap na pati Cisco ibabagsak ko pa. ganun na ba talaga ko kalala?!

Question: If you were given a chance to take another program/s, what will that be? Answer: Journalism. Communication Arts. Tourism. COMPUTER SCIENCE will NEVER be on the list.

there's something wrong. i'm not anymore happy with the way my life goes. i can say that i am happy with someone though we're not committed; but then everything falls apart INCLUDING my academics. bat pag nagiging masaya ko sa isang part ng buhay ko, biglang lulubog ng bigla ung kabilang part? how can this world be so cruel to me? :((

i don't want my parents to get frustrated pati sakin. this is not what they wanted for me. everybody expects me to be graduating on March 2009. i myself even do. but what if, this failures are signs? signs that i'm already not taking the right path? that on the next semester, i will fail again and again? HUHU. this is the hardest moment. it's not about the present; it's already about the future. why just now? why not on my 1st year or 2nd year in college when everything could still be patched up? :c

please encourage me not to think that life will always be unfair to me. i'm starting to hate myself and my life. this is not good anymore. :[

*cries*

i have 3 more subjects to take. i can't concentrate. i keep on thinking that there's no more hope left... that whether i study or not, i will still end up as a FAILURE in everybody's eyes. :((

SERIOUSLY, I FEEL LIKE I'M THE MOST STUPID PERSON IN THE CLASS.
you think it's still good? =/

i won't ask you guys to wish luck for me. luck was never on my vocabulary.

"SATAN SMILED ON ME TODAY..."